Deciding of Life Priorites

since the events of last year the god awful break up which left my life upside down and me rapidly spinning out of control I had only just at the time started working for my self  so I was very stressed to say the least I do feel now over a year latter that I have started to pull things back together don’t get me wrong they are  by no means perfect as yet but they are getting better  day by day.

I’m now having CBT to help me  deal with the stress that I’ve been under during the relationship with he who shall not be named I had put on a lot of weight which I have only recently started to shed.  So back to the gym it is for me  and lot of healthy eating My diet is seriously improved but this can fluctuate most of the foods Ive been eating have had mostly been vegetarian I’ve also found my love of cooking again.

red guacamole I made with onions, baby tomatoes and tomato puree with veggie burgers  this was great guacamole

Ive also started to draw again  which is some thing that I love.

I went on a date on saturday we spent the whole day talking about  random stuff it was great I hope we meet up again.

so all in all things are looking  up whoop .

So what i relay need to keep doing is focus on doing things that help me out and can keep me moving forward.

5 Things I Love about being self employed and 5 I Dont

Things I Love about it

1.I’m my own boss

I set my hours I work when I want  and where I want now this can have both positive and negative effects  some times this means I over work my self

2. I can chose what projects I work on

I Don’t have to have projects  handed  to me  and  work on my part  of it then sign off and thats it  Im there  from start to finish  of the project

3. I’m not tide to a desk all day

I can work any where that I can get a wifi signal in the past i have edited  videos in coffee shops and worked on websites on trains I have even  worked on my own sofa

4.I only have to work with others when I want or need to

I have  become a bit on a recluse of late  and this is because a lot of the time Being in a room full of people babbling away  can distract me and I find it some times hard  to concentrate

5.the creative  freedom

since being self employed I have felt that I have become more creative and have had more time to sit and think on things that I want to do

What I Don’t love about it

1. chasing  invoices

as part of being self employed you are  going to have to send out invoices to customers  this isn’t a problem I use a great  system called wave for most of my work out side of people per hour and  for people per hour its mostly dealt with by there systems but the one thing i hate having  to do it chase delinquent invoices that have not been paid by  clients  its a bit of a bug bear of mine.

2. being overworked

this can sometime be a good thing but I think something that I still have to learn  about being  self employed is setting boundaries for when I should work and when I shouldn’t.

3. not having enough work

being self employed can  have its peaks and troughs meaning that  one month I can have lots of work on and the next I can find my self  just  getting the required amount in I hate these times because  they can lead to self doubt  but yet again I think this is down more to time management than any thing else

4. finding a good work life balance

I only put this in the hate section as I find it a bit of a struggle but i assume I shall figure this out in time as I am only early  on in my self employed Journey.

5. feeling unsure about the future

as any one who has ever started  there own business or become self employed will know  one of the most scary things can be letting go of the safe net that a monthly wage brings


the price of coffee, getting rid of old crap and following your dreams

So I was sat  at my  desk  this after none  sipping my cup of java  and reading and thinking about  a story  I read  via a social media stream this weekend that the cost of coffee is due  to rise.  Brazil’s Arabica coffee prices have recently surged 94 percent, to $2.144 a pound on the New York futures market.  The price spike is a result of bad weather in Brazil.

This got me to thinking about the prices that we pay for a coffee from business such as Starbucks and costa not to say that a half fat double shot Americano with cameral isn’t nice but when did it become the norm that a coffee from such a place should cost what to some people is nearly a hours wage and is these articles are any thing to go by the cost is going to rise the thing that I always think is that I can buy a bag of fresh ground coffee for around £3- 5.00 as well as lets say the cost of a coffee and a doughnut at dun-kin doughnuts the base cost of the raw ingredients are not equal to the final price of the end products that you receive.

What your paying for is a logo and the reputation of a brand. in theory you could buy the same beans grind them your self and make the same coffee all your self at a fraction of the cost we have become a society of consumers.

Well a 1st world individual has any way there is a large majority of the population in the third world that lives purely off of take away and restaurant food and ready meals we can place orders for items which are delivered the following day every thing has become a connivence now there is not thing wrong with this but to much of anything is a bad thing no matter how good it is.


How much  crap  do you have ?
How much crap do you have ?

It also  brought up thoughts  from a TEDx talk that I watched last night
TEDxAsheville – Adam Baker – Sell your crap. Pay your debt. Do what you love.

where Adam talks about how shortly after the birth of his daughter he and his wife had a discussion about what they actually wanted from life. and that he eventually came to a realisation that he and his wife were in the early twenties and in around 18 thousand pounds worth of personal debt not including debts that they had such as college loans.

this also brings me to convince again we have accepted that it is fine  to be in mass amounts of debt from a young  age now  don’t get  me  wrong there are  different  sorts  of debt  what Adam  was focusing on here  was Personal  debt,  we  want the latest  new flat screen TV we  take  out a loan  new  car  lets  finance it  so on and so fourth we gauge  how  successful some one  is  by the  size of there  house how flashy there car  and clothes are. so what  do  we  do we collect  crap  we build up our  collection of  video’s, games books etc  and  when we have  run out of space  to  fill our  spare  rooms  with this crap we  then  g on  to rent  space  to store our old crap  so  we can  buy new crap.

So I think it was about  time I sold off my crap pay of some of my debts and start enjoying life.


Spoon Theory

Plastic of the "disposable" variety. (Alex Smith, Creative Commons Attribution 2.0 Generic License)

I was  reading  the  spoon theory  by  Christine Miserandino  on her  site and  was thinking  how  this applied  to a situation  I had  last  year  and  is still on going  with the  local  council and my  council tax  where I live they  had  made a decision that  if  I was able  to sign in  at the job centre  for JSA and  get a business up and running  for a period of nearly  4 months that  i should have  been well enough to be able  to  get  my  claim  for  council tax benefit  in  on  time ( to be honest  at the  time I was very  low on spoons  and was barely  getting out of bed  most mornings).

how ever for  various  reasons  including a  really  bad bout  of  depression  which  had   been affecting me  since  january  of last  year  and  had  come and  gone  for the for the whole year  and to be  honest  still is  holding on for  dear life  rather like the black dog  cartoon.  I had also  broken  up with my   ex who  has taken me and my finances  for a bit  of a joy ride to say the least and  I m having  to service various  debts  created by him. I’m  getting  a little off  point  here  though.

So the issues  is that   the council  says  that I should  have  been  able  to  get my  claim  in  for  council tax benefit  with  no  hassle at  all I’m  sorry  I don’t  think  this is the case at the  time  my  “Spoon Count”  was very  low  to say the least and as  said  before I was barely  getting  out of  bed in the morning  a majority of the  time I spelt  though  whole days  I was  working  from bed  when I  could  to be honest the last  thing  on my  mind  was  getting  out of the house and  going  to the  city  council  hall  to get  extra  stuff  sorted  but  unfortunately  it  would  appear that my  case  has  been  dealt  with  yet  again  by  somebody   who has no  idea  about mental  health and  how it affects a person  slow clap  to that individual there.

if any  one is reading  this out there  how  do you  find  you deal  with mental of  physical illness  do you  use  spoon theory  to explain  your  situations  or  do you have another method  please let me  knowI’m always interested in how others deal with these things  .

Thanks  to  a friend  of  mine  Kat  for introducing  me to spoon theory.



project management triangle

I have  been freelanceing  for nearly  2 years now on and off and  I feel that I have  quite  a good grasp  of   the market  place and  how things  work

taken from

and  as the  following image  shows  there is always  going to be  a direct  coloration  between  scope(ie what the project  requires) cost( how much  your  willing to spend ) and schedule( how long  you have yo complete  said  project ) all of these have an effect on  what  the quality  of the final  product is going to be   such as  some body  as king  for a  site to be built  that  mimics  say  google for £100 you may  find  somebody that is willing to  do this  for you  for that price but its  going to  take a while to get that  site its not going to be a rush  job.

This brings me to my point  all clients  out there please  don’t take this  to much to heart but  are  you mad when you ask a professional to build  you a fully  working site  with all bells and whistles included  with in 2 days  for £100.00  this is not  really feasible  you can get it done  in that  time scales yes but as its a rush  job and  your  designers is  more than likely  going to have yo pull a all night to get it completed for you in that time scale .

Your going to get charged more I’m sorry  but that is the way of things and it upsets me that people can not get this  there is a direct  connection between  time and cost  the saying time is money is not simply that a saying it is a truth  that many  people in the freelancing  world  live and work by.

Because  that  fact  of the matter is that  when i spend a whole weekend  building your site that is a whole weekend that I have lost and I am not getting to spend with my friends or family . this brings me  down to the roots of  this at the end of the day  would  you work a full weekend  on a project for some one else and expect to  get paid a pitance I don’t think  you would  now would you .


a few examples of client stupid ness can be found here


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